Most parents love their children and want what's best for them. Sometimes when couples split, they disagree about the who really has the best interests of the children in mind. If a couple can't come to a satisfactory custody agreement, the court can step in and appoint a child custody evaluator to assess the situation. Having your parenting skills evaluated by a professional is definitely nerve wracking. Experts have to some tips on making the best possible impression.
Remember that the person doing the evaluating is a professional. This is not a person you should try to make friends with or confide in. She is not in your home to be your confessor or to take your side against the other parent. Evaluators are independent and in the business of making a non-biased assessment of the individuals. Your best bet is to behave in a way that is as professional and business like as the person evaluating you.
Complete honesty is the best strategy. If you tell a lie the assessor will know, and it will go against you. Experienced evaluators have heard it all and know when someone is evading the truth. A judge won't be impressed with an excuse of nervousness if the report he receives includes information about your exaggerations or untruths.
Go into your meetings prepared. You should never be late to the meetings with the individual conducting your evaluation. If you are meeting in this person's office, and you aren't familiar with the location, be sure to get good directions in advance. You need to arrive a little early, especially if you're not sure about the parking situation. It is perfectly acceptable to take notes during the meeting.
When a home visit is scheduled, you have to make sure your house is spic and span. You do not want the evaluator to look around and wonder if your dirty house is representative of the way you are raising your children. If children's academic and medical records have been requested, be sure you have them ready and put together in an organized fashion.
You must remember that you are not the focus of the evaluator's assessment. The assessor is focused on the best interests of the children. Her job is not to judge your marital situation, except as it affects the kids. If you are asked, you can give an opinion as to the effectiveness of your spouse's parenting skills. You must do it in a thoughtful way however.
You must cooperate fully with the person doing your evaluation. You need to provide all the information requested promptly. You will probably be asked for names and contact information for family and friends who can vouch for your parenting skills. This is an opportunity for you to place yourself in a good light.
Being evaluated as a parent is awkward and stressful. Evaluators understand that and take it into consideration. The best thing you can do is to be honest, polite, cooperative, and informative.
Remember that the person doing the evaluating is a professional. This is not a person you should try to make friends with or confide in. She is not in your home to be your confessor or to take your side against the other parent. Evaluators are independent and in the business of making a non-biased assessment of the individuals. Your best bet is to behave in a way that is as professional and business like as the person evaluating you.
Complete honesty is the best strategy. If you tell a lie the assessor will know, and it will go against you. Experienced evaluators have heard it all and know when someone is evading the truth. A judge won't be impressed with an excuse of nervousness if the report he receives includes information about your exaggerations or untruths.
Go into your meetings prepared. You should never be late to the meetings with the individual conducting your evaluation. If you are meeting in this person's office, and you aren't familiar with the location, be sure to get good directions in advance. You need to arrive a little early, especially if you're not sure about the parking situation. It is perfectly acceptable to take notes during the meeting.
When a home visit is scheduled, you have to make sure your house is spic and span. You do not want the evaluator to look around and wonder if your dirty house is representative of the way you are raising your children. If children's academic and medical records have been requested, be sure you have them ready and put together in an organized fashion.
You must remember that you are not the focus of the evaluator's assessment. The assessor is focused on the best interests of the children. Her job is not to judge your marital situation, except as it affects the kids. If you are asked, you can give an opinion as to the effectiveness of your spouse's parenting skills. You must do it in a thoughtful way however.
You must cooperate fully with the person doing your evaluation. You need to provide all the information requested promptly. You will probably be asked for names and contact information for family and friends who can vouch for your parenting skills. This is an opportunity for you to place yourself in a good light.
Being evaluated as a parent is awkward and stressful. Evaluators understand that and take it into consideration. The best thing you can do is to be honest, polite, cooperative, and informative.
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